So how come the Easter Bunny is a boy, skipping around with a basket of chicken eggs?
How can you explain that to your children?
Yet no one, as far as I know, ever gets sanctimonious about a male who seems to have ovulated, thumbing his paw at all the rules.
My posse thinks it’s “Too weird for comment.” Or “Maybe it’s an early transgender thing, followed by a massive coverup.”
Conspiracy theories are in vogue everywhere.
My posse, a bunch of passionately imaginative intellectuals, isn’t troubled at all by the Bunny’s having acquired a basket of eggs.
“It’s just a story to sell products,” they scoff. “Nothing to see there.”
But they are assisting in the coverup of a crime.
The Easter Bunny is obviously a thief.
So this bunny dude lurks around the chicken house, peeping at unsuspecting inhabitants, seeing them when they’re sleeping and knowing when they’re awake – and then he pounces.
And you, the multitudes of 30-Second Read readers, have known all your lives about this massive crime against nature.
You claim not to notice. Ha!
As in all other holidays (“Certainly Santa is real!”), I am comfortable in my complicity.