Even the most devoted face-mask proselytizers offer reasonable beefs. Face masks are hot. They fog up eyeglasses. They leave us sucking stale and clammy air. And they cheat a hurting world of smiles.
Never in history have mere scraps of cloth delivered so much discomfort to so many – and that’s before counting their culture-war capacity to gin up anger.
But there’s worse. Way worse.
It’s about our ears.
Don a face mask. Do so now. We’ll wait.
Ready?
Now find a mirror. Look at your ears.
At least one is sticking out, right?
I bought pricey face masks ($7 each!) to get adjustable ear straps. Yet after much fiddling, the straps still prompt my right ear to protrude as if a dinner plate had been affixed to my head, sideways.
Beats me why the left ear is spared. Good thing it is, or I wouldn’t fit through doorways.
I wear a mask. Doing so is a civic responsibility and moral imperative. I bear the discomforts willingly.
But why must these scraps of public-health necessity give me Alfred E. Neuman ears?
