30-Second Read trusts you to keep up on important news about wars, politics and Kate Middleton’s photo hobby.
So, today, we’ll help with the other stuff sometimes called “news.” Here’s what you might have missed.
The New York Post published “Florida man has 150 live bugs removed from his nose, sinuses.” Ick!
And from the Huffington Post, another gross critter: “Scorpion Stung Man In His Testicles While He Slept At a Las Vegas Hotel.” Go ahead, wince. We did.
Mental Floss offered lighter fare with “10 of the Most Famous Nappers in History.” The methodology isn’t explained. But – yay! – Winston Churchill and Lin-Manuel Miranda made the list.
Here’s a doozie from The Spun: “Aaron Rodgers Has Revealed His Theory On JFK’s Assassination.” Does anyone, anywhere, care what that washed-up ball tosser thinks about anything? Right.
For the silliest silliness, here’s Tasting Table: “How You Should Eat Your Eggs In The Morning, Based On Your Zodiac Sign.”
“Zodiac signs are about as ubiquitous to society as eggs,” the website explains. “There’s no escaping either.”
Taurus here. Gagging. On a scorpion omelet.
Hahahahaha
Aaron Rodgers is a scorpion of a human being.
Exactly.