Move over, Isaac Newton. The 30-Second Read research team has discovered a new law of the universe. And it’s big.
Our CEO (me) was initially skeptical and rightly so. Our lead researcher (also me) can be excessively exuberant, and our editor (me again) will publish anything to fill a hole in the editorial calendar.
But we’ve vetted this discovery well – across many decades of sleeping and especially waking.
Truly, you may greet our discovery with confidence. We have the data. It will survive the scrutiny of peer review. And it will withstand validation testing in other laboratories, including the laboratory of your bedroom.
Why else would our CEO, always a humorless frump, have approved today’s announcement?
So, here’s the new law of the universe: human perception of time changes when waking early for work versus waking early on a weekend or day off. Workday waking is a drudge. Waking early on a day off is a joy.
That’s a whole lot of science. To simplify, we’ve dubbed it the Workday Time Flex. Or, as we say in the lab: WTF.
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A modest proposal about weekends
A human, cow and bird walk into a bar
Hahahaha!!!