An announcement: I am sexy and hot.
You’ll want proof, of course. As did I! And I have it in a study from the Journal of Evolutionary Biology.
The title is long, so catch a breath: “The masculinity paradox: facial masculinity and beardedness interact to determine women’s ratings of men’s facial attractiveness.”
For the study, 8,520 women rated photos of men with bare faces, light stubble, heavy stubble or full beards for attractiveness. The study also addressed variation in male faces on a masculine-to-feminine scale.
“Heavy stubble received the highest ratings for general attractiveness followed by full beards and light stubble,” the study concluded, “with clean-shaven faces being rated least attractive.”
The remaining findings are confusing and contradictory. I read closely for 30 minutes and couldn’t make sense of them. I obviously wasted my college education in the humanities.
So let’s keep it simple. I have a beard that, based on the study’s examples, I declare heavy stubble. The study said women rated heavy stubble highest for attractiveness.
Therefore – and unequivocally so, according to science – I am sexy and hot.
