Only clowns think they have all the answers. Today, I’m the clown. Because I have answers, and I’ll share them – the secrets to living well.
So, embrace my secrets and choose happiness and fulfillment.
Or not.
Here they are, a clown’s secrets.
Wear shorts until temperatures sink below 45 degrees. Your legs want to be free.
Load toilet paper to spin off the top. It’s a law of nature, or ought to be.
Park as far from a store as possible when shopping. Your companions will whine. But over decades, the extra steps will stretch to tens of thousands.
Wash while you cook. Nothing dampens your enjoyment of a good meal more than the anticipation of cleaning up.
Drink coffee without cream, sugar or flavored squirts. As the coffee gods intended.
Put pineapple on pizza. Sweet belongs with salty. You know it. Just do it.
Don’t squish bugs. Except Louisiana cockroaches cohabitating without a lease. They’re as big as skateboards. Really. And mosquitos.
Follow fewer rules. Because many rules are silly, and the people who make silly rules are clowns.
I’ve interviewed a lot of Bozos in my day. Your advice has logic in most cases. My over/under on shorts for running or golf is 50 degrees. But I can do with flavors in my coffee as long as its not muddled with that other stuff. Also for your list: brown liquor with one big cube.