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Taking it all off for ‘news’

Like all 4.88 billion earthlings with smartphones, I wasted time yesterday scrolling through videos.

And there, among talent show auditions and airplane crashes, appeared a Facebook video ad for Naked News. It featured a woman in a bikini selling subscriptions to news summaries presented by naked women.

You’re thinking it. So, yes. I watched.

“Welcome to Naked News,” the woman said.

Then, like a fly to a turd, I visited the Naked News website.

To check the facts.

Are you buying that excuse?

“The sexiest reporters around the world cover news, sports, pop culture and much more,” Naked News says in a welcome message. “And while they strip down the facts, they strip down themselves.”

Just $8 per month.

More searching led to an astonishing fact: Naked News debuted in 1999, launched by a Canadian company. It is to the webverse and pay TV what cockroaches are on Earth. Ancient.

Sex powers Naked News. It’s porn masquerading – winkingly – as news.

But sex powers real news, too. How do we know?

Gary Hart. Bill Clinton. Bill Cosby. Jeffrey Epstein.

Donald Trump.


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3 Comments

  1. Carrie Kent Carrie Kent

    God, I miss Walter Cronkite.

  2. Steve Steve

    In search of delivering the bare facts, do some anchors lean left and others right?

    • At Naked News, they lean clean out of their underpants.

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